19 Oct Happy to be true to me x
Today I am going to be honest, to me (and therefore to you) about a few truths I need to admit to myself … I want to put these truths out there and just be honest … I am not 100% sure why I want to be honest, I just know that I feel like I need to, and so I am going to …
I think part of me wanting to be honest comes from the fact I know we coming to the end of the year, and at this time of the year I always ‘clear out and plan’ for my new year. I know some of you are thinking: “really Joy, really??? It’s only October!” Well actually … it is 10 weeks until the end of the year, and then yes … here is truth number one … I like to be planned super far in advance, and so organized. That is what makes me, Joy … and why you probably reading this or following my YouTube channel … because I am organized, and I really like to be. It drives Andy crazy, but hey, it’s not like he didn’t know this about me when we got together (and secretly I think he likes that I am organized!)
But, truth number two is that this exercise wasn’t about me being honest about stuff like this. This is not a hard one to admit! So, back to me being honest … here we go …
I absolutely hate it when someone points a finger at me would be truth number three, and by this I mean when someone points out that I haven’t done something, or I should’ve done something, or what I did was wrong in their mind, or not good enough. I hate it (only) because I get totally mad at myself for not being perfect … and yes, I know, everyone makes mistakes, and everyone has to learn from them, and and and … but I beat myself up about this, all the time.
Truth number four would be that I don’t like being told I cannot do something. I am totally okay if someone says they don’t agree, or discusses the ‘something’ with me to convince me of their point, but if I am outright told “no, you cannot do xyz” I want to do it more than ever. And somehow, in my way, I will do it.
I guess that number 4 leads in to truth number five, which is that I am pretty stubborn, oi I hate it when something is not going to go my way. But I can say truth number six is that I have definitely loosened up on this one since having meet Andy. I am not sure if that is because in any relationship you have to compromise, but I think it is also because he is the complete opposite to me in so many aspects. I have come to realise that things eventually all work out how they are meant to, it is just that sometimes it takes longer or happens in a different form. But it all happens.
I make decisions very quickly, because I am very open to change, and I can adapt very easily to what needs to happen next … but because of that I don’t always think things through completely and utterly, I just go with what I think and my gut, which would be truth number seven. I like being a quick thinker, but there are definitely times that Andy won’t make a decision quickly, and the time he takes and the discussions that happen definitely get us to a better place for us.
My truth number eight is that I am very impatient and I want everything I ask for, or want, NOW! And it is funny because I see this in my mom, and it sometimes drives me crazy … she asks me something and wants it done now! And I get cross that she wants it now, but I do exactly the same … we always see our ‘quirks’ in others.
OK, I think I will stop there … 🙂
Those are my truths… and I love me, even my weird, different parts, and my not so nice characteristics …